Favors... On their Terms

Been crazy busy but popping in to write about something that's been bothering me a lot. I tend to do a lot of favors for people, be it family members or friends. It's who I am. In general people know me as someone they can rely on to say yes if they need something and I'm happy that B"H I usually have the ability to jump in and help, be it with housework, schoolwork, or anything else.

But I happen to keep a pretty busy schedule of my own. I try not to complain a whole lot so people tend not to realize how much stress I'm under between grad school, dating, and family life... and sometimes they ask me for favors as if I have nothing else going on. I agree to the favor but they want it done now. If it happens to be a moment that I stopped to catch my breath from my own life- they still want their favor from me immediately and don't seem to understand the answer of "Yes, in a few". I usually try to accommodate them but sometimes as much as I want to help I just want a few minutes/hours/days to relax before I plunge into their request. Sometimes I prefer to put other favors/obligations before their favor, for whatever reason or circumstance that isn't necessarily their business. Even though I wholly acquiesce to their favor, suddenly I am evil for not catering to them immediately. I do not understand this entitlement and it bugs me tremendously. I should be entitled to have some say in how I choose to carry out their request.

For instance, a friend from undergrad is currently applying to medical school and wants me to proofread his essay. That's a big task and I already reconstructed a few other scholarship essays of his this year, one of which he won an award for. I'm happy for him. But when he sends me an essay during my finals week to proofread and then continuously reminds me that he needs me... I tell him I will look at it when finals are over. However, when finals are over- I need some time to myself before I get back to work. And on top of that, a job that was supposed to be a proofing for grammar and style has become a content face lift so that it's a good medical school essay. This upsets me. It's my vacation which is ending on Monday. My brain was squeezed dry for my own statement of purpose which took hours to think up and write that got me into a doctoral program. Now I have the responsibility to come up with another brainchild- one that gets him into medical school? This is a favor gone too far. I kindly told him that this is not my job. I can't. Perhaps some of you can relate to the grueling year of grad school applications. It's intense, but then you are able to push past and move on (and hopefully get accepted somewhere) without looking back. That was a very difficult stage in life but everyone deals with it and now it is your turn. I would barely have the strength to help my own brother and now I'm being asked for a thankless favor, on his own terms since admissions already opened and he's getting antsy about my slow pace of revisions. At the same time, I have a life. I want to help him but this time constraint is really annoying me. I don't want to say no but the terms of agreement here are way too strict for my benevolent side.